After my post on me being mean to M I thought I’d make another one with an idea M talked with me about last night.

He thinks on some level unconsciously (aside from or in addition to how much he might be a masochist and how much I might be a sadist) that all of this might be an act of love. In his words I “test how much he loves me” which is something very few other couples ever do.

And I think I agree. How much can you say you truly love your partner if they’ve never cheated on you? How much can you say you truly love your partner if you’ve never given them to the freedom to fuck other people or even fall in love with them? If they come back to you after all of that then it’s a concrete way of knowing your love is forever, and that is not something most normal couples can know. If you don’t explore those things with the person you love without guilt or societal pressures to stop or do the opposite, then how can you know you don’t enjoy them? And how can you say your partner is the best thing ever if you’ve never explored those other things at the height of their enjoyability?

I think it’s something a lot of people need to think about. And I think it’s something that describes us so well. We love each other and we’re willing to test that to any extent in both fantasy and reality.

- H

Yeah, we’re dorks. We love that about ourselves. We also love horrible, horrible puns. Sometimes.

I’ve only seen the first series (alone) and the recent Star Trek movies (with H) but I wonder how Klingon sex would actually go. With the whole dominating culture, I’m sure it’d be something H would take at least a passing interest in.

- M

I’ve hurt M. I let him watch as I fell in love with someone else in high school. I drove him crazy when we talked and I made him listen about guy after guy I slept with. I broke his heart when I cheated on him.
Sometimes I think he’s a masochist. He...

I’ve hurt M. I let him watch as I fell in love with someone else in high school. I drove him crazy when we talked and I made him listen about guy after guy I slept with. I broke his heart when I cheated on him.

Sometimes I think he’s a masochist. He gets turned on whenever I mention those things. Whenever we play with fantasies of jealousy or other men taking me from him or me choosing other men over him, it gets him hard in a way no other playing can. He’s told me he’s spent every night since he met me either yearning for me or crying over me and masturbating to the thought of me and other men, and I don’t doubt it.

Sometimes I think I’m a sadist. Sometimes I go too far when I tease him. I tell him I’m going to make his past fantasies come true. I tell him I’m going to go out and sleep with a stranger. I tell him I’m going to fuck around unprotected. I tell him I’m going to start seeing my ex again but not tell him about it. I tell him I’m going to fall in love with someone and never let him inside me again…

Maybe it’s mean. But it turns him on like nothing else and it does the same for me. And I don’t know if it’s despite everything I’ve done or because of everything I do for him but he’s the sweetest, kindest, most loving person I’ve ever met. He says he’s a better person because of me and I feel the same way about him. We’re closer than ever because of cuckolding. I truly love him.

And so last night I promised him something… We both want this so it’s going to happen. I’m going to get back into contact with my ex today. I’m going to tell him about my relationship with M and what we both want from him. He’ll need to respect our love and relationship but I’m going to let him know how far we’re okay with it going. I know him. He’ll love it just as much as we will.

- H

(via cuckoldstoryteller)

Q

mandn4541 asked:

Love your blog. Would you consider changing the color of your captions, to a darker color, so that we can read them better? Thanks

A

Wow we got a ton of follows in the past few hours… no doubt from one or two people on here who reblogged us. Thank you all so very much!

We also got a ton of asks like this. Yes we’ll do our best to switch the font or background colour so it’s more readable. Thanks for letting us know!

- H

We just got an ask from a tumblr-er who wishes to remain private, so we’ll answer it in a post instead.

The person asked what kind of relationship we have, and to give a word to describe it in a set term, or to make up one if we found none appropriate.

Our answer is as follows:

We don’t know.

There are a ton of words out there, but our arrangement is rather fluid (we created the blog to explore and push, after all) and labels usually have specific connotations which may or may not apply to us in one or another circumstance.

The word “cuckolding” might imply some form of humiliation or H being in control over M sexually. That’s slightly true. M does love light humiliation, especially when it comes to being helpless while H takes or gets taken by a lover. However, neither M nor H are turned on by degrading each other or forcing M to go down on her after a lover to eat leftovers. And while H does love being submissive to other men and in a more dominant position in regard to M, the reality of a safe word and moods always override that.

The word “hotwife” or “slutwife” don’t entirely work. Although H is beautiful (in M’s words), the connotations of hot and slut bring forward a more cultural way of judging someone. H has rather wild wispy hair, a little pouch of a tummy, doesn’t shave or wax anywhere (except armpits, and she has really light hair on her arms and legs), and refuses to paint her face with things that may or may not contain harmful chemicals. She would also either ignore or slap anyone who called her a slut in public. So she isn’t really the portrayal of a girl you’d see on tv or movie posters. She’d never make any entertainment show’s “top 20” anything list. And we’re not married yet, so there’s that.

The term “polyamorous” is a strange one. We don’t share love–we love each other, no one else–but we both agree it’s possible to love others (family, friends, childhood pets, Game of Thrones) so we don’t exactly know what to say. She would love to indulge in the feeling of falling in love again (quite possibly with her ex, as mentioned in the last caption), but she would never want to leave M for him or live out the rest of her life without M by her side at night. Love’s a complicated word as it is–you can love one person, a group of people, and/or the feeling of eating a homemade cheeseburger on your apartment rooftop on a sunny Tuesday. (Edit: go listen to Adam Cohen’s “What Other Guy”, a song which might make you understand how we feel about each other a bit better (as opposed to others), if not make you sing along and swoon after a repeat playing.)

In the end (although this is maybe more of a beginning?) we chose cuckolding for one very childish reason: it sounds like fuck. H cucks M is something that sounded fun, so we went with that for our name. And “cucu” (curious and cuck) couple sounded kinda similar to “coo coo” (as in we’re a little coo coo crazy), which I suppose is a reaction to our first time discussing it hypothetically with someone–who thought it was crazy.

So it’s all about fun sexually. But why would we want anything else?

- M & H

Edit: This post is continued in this post.

My biggest, scariest, craziest, most excitement-producing, most anxiety-provoking fantasy. (H risking pregnancy would be my second biggest, and vice versa for her, at least in terms of how they make us feel.) It’s something we’ve talked about since we started discussing open relationships, despite only talking about it as a serious possibility for the past few months.

She loves teasing me with it, and I love how she gets when she does. As I wrote this in fact, she kissed and stroked and grinned. I can’t believe how lucky I am to have her in my life.

- M

Q

wanderlustcuck asked:

Also, one other question. What was it that H loved so much about the sex with her ex? Size? Stamina?His dominance in bed? Something else? Just wondering?

A

When it comes to her ex, it’s all of those things.

His physicality is one part. That encompasses his size (in her words, it’s perfect), his stamina (for the most part, H and I make love, which doesn’t require all that much stamina, with him it was that half of the time and the other half spurts of against-the-wall-pound-your-brains-out moments), and simply his body (H is manly men, which I can’t really give her, and her ex is the epitome of masculine–muscular but toned, broad shoulders and jaw, the kind of person you’d expect to see on a hunky teen drama.)

His personality is another part. According to her, he can be really dominant (which she loves, at times) not just in bed but in life. His ability to push her is another thing (during the months of their break-up, he knew exactly what to say to charm her into “one last night” over and over again), along with a more naturalistic part of him. I don’t know exactly how to say it, so I’ll use a word she used once. He’s a “neanderthal”, because he takes what he wants and is a bit relentless when other people say no to him.

She teases me sometimes with the image of him being a cave man raider and me being a helpless villager–he plunders and takes his prize, and I can’t do it because of what I lack in my physicality and personality. That probably also plays into growing out her hair and teasing me about not using protection. With him, she reverts to her inner cave woman, and forsakes all modern day novelties. And that’s something she hasn’t really felt with anyone else.

- M

Q

wanderlustcuck asked:

I don't know if you told the story and I missed it, but from your history page, it sounds like H cuckolded M with a stranger in June of last year. Would you mind telling that story in more detail? Did M know about it while it was happening? How did H meet the guy? How was it? How did things go when H came home to M? I love your page by the way. I'm right on the edge of my seat with M wondering what H is going to do. Thanks for sharing it with us!

A

It was a borderline moment for both of us. It all happened in sort of an intoxicated haze, but after talking and playing with the fantasy for a while, we decided to just throw caution to the wind and try it.

I knew about it beforehand and knew where she would be. It happened at a hotel with someone I’d never met before, but someone she’d wanted to sleep with for a while. For privacy reasons, I won’t say exactly who it was, but I will say it was someone in a position of power over her.

It went well for the most part. She went down on him, he did the same for her, and they had sex twice. In H’s words, he wasn’t the best she’s ever had, but she did enjoy it.

When she came home we were more tentative instead of turned on. I’d already masturbated to my heart’s content by that time and was coming down, so it was more a moment of reassurance than anything. We both got naked, laid in bed, and just talked about it for a long time. Eventually we did bring each other to one last orgasm for the night then slept. The next day the same. In bed or around our apartment suite, just lazy and talking.

She never slept with him again. It was something they agreed would be a one time thing, and I’m sure he was more afraid than she was of anyone finding out.

Thanks for the ask, and maybe I’ll append this to the history page in case anyone wants to know in the future.

- M

Q

behindmyboyfriendsback asked:

I'm just curious, when you explore, do you have any limits? Are there things that you play with in fantasy, but would never, ever do in reality? Are things different for H than they are for M?

A

Yes we do, as I think any rational couple does. For the most part our limits overlap, although at times they’re ambiguous.

One of H’s limits is that she doesn’t want emotions involved. After high school she had a few “relationships” (although that’s a tentative word) where she was in a state of almost perpetually falling for a number of different men. However, they weren’t willing to or capable of giving her the care and affection, love and attention she needed (which is why our relationship works out; I give an excess of it, she needs an excess of it.) So in order to avoid that, she won’t play with the word “love” when it comes to other men. All of that blurs when it comes to her ex however–she’d never leave me for him, but the thought of her falling for him again is something that both scares and excites us.

One of my limits for H is that she never be tied up. It’s something she’s wanted to try in the past with the men she’s met, but for safety reasons is something I can’t condone. The same goes for me not knowing where she is when she plays–I always have to know, and we have to keep in constant communication (at least every hour or so) just to be sure. Her physical safety is my top priority. The ambiguous part for that is when it comes to me. She has a few fantasies about tying me up to a chair and gagging me while she and someone go at it, so we keep that open as a possibility.

Being completely candid, we aren’t sure where most of our limits lie. Both of our families and friends are a hard limit. We don’t want them to know. That’s partly why we started this tumblr, to help explore and push the envelope, to communicate honestly with strangers in a safe space, because that’s the only way we can find out how much is too much.- M

This is an actual game my darling M came up with which he has begged me to do for real… I’m not sure I could but I tingle all over at the thought of it. And all I can do is tease him with it…

I might have to do it. He’s been such a good little cucky sweetheart lately. I love him so much.

- H